Hunglish.orgToilets, I know, not a pleasant topic to spend too much time dancing around the tables with, but this is raw, practical advice here because toilets as we know, and as much as we hate them, have a definate role in our lives in the contemporary world.
One of the most annoying things about moving to Central Europe was the discovery of the shelf system (or, as I like to call it, the S--- Shelf System or SSS) of toilet basin design. Communist design and architecture was not noted for its creativity. Whereas in nature there are no straight lines, in communist Hungarian engineering there was almost nothing but.
Unfortunately this straight-line mentality crept into the design of the bogs. The result is that now, in many places in Hungary and Central Europe, people defecate onto a porcelain platform rather than directly into the water. The water comes down afterwards and attempts to lift your offering away to freedom.
*Attempts.*
What this design feature insures is that one upset stomach can stink out almost an entire panel flat. This model also ensures that a brush will be necessary, will be used, and get quite dirty because the waterfall never quite does the trick.
The conception is better that the throneless johns you might find further South and East, however. In those places you have to kind of hover over a basin, with leg muscles straining, which I think would cut into my reading time considerably.
The system here was one of the first cultural challenges I had to face in Hungary. Nobody I met could see anything wrong with the SSS method. To them, it was "normal.” To me, it was clearly a half-baked blueprint created by a lazy engineer between 2.58 and 2.59 on a Friday afternoon back in socialist Hungary. He ticked off "plan toilet architecture” and then took a smoke break.
Or could it have been done on purpose? Did some malicious communist draw that straight line saying "This is going to reek...”
Whatever the cause, since that time, these flat (or sometimes very slightly concave) shelves present the user with a good look at (and whiff of) his or her fecal matter. All because nobody reexamined how well the fixture actually worked.
Written by Scott Savoie